A self-conscious tourist had a crisis of confidence after visiting Russia, complaining: "The ladies living in Russia were so beautiful they totally crushed my self-esteem."
One tourist blamed relaxed beach etiquette for her husband’s wandering eye, complaining: "Topless sunbathing on the beach should be banned. The holiday was ruined as my husband spent all day looking at other women." Another moaned: "The beach had too many fat people. It was gross."
One disgruntled tourist wasn't happy about the lack of fruit (or types of fruit) in their sangria, writing "Our jug of sangria didn’t have a wide-ranging fruit selection in it.” At least they're health-conscious.
Trouble sleeping caused issues for one customer, who complained: "My girlfriend kept me awake because she was snoring. Can I have a discount?" Another blamed her pregnancy on the travel agent, writing: "My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but we were placed in a double. I'm now pregnant." Another couple were incensed to find their neighbours had booked the same hotel, moaning: "When we got to the resort we found out that Bert and Mavis from down the road were also there. I hate Bert."
The Louvre is one of the world’s most popular museums but TripAdvisor reviewer Palindromeman was seriously unimpressed by his visit. He wrote: "Musee [sic] du Louvre – bad. Short answer: bored… Apparently there is between 14 to 16 kilometres of boredom on offer at the Louvre. I could not do it." Of the Mona Lisa, he wrote: "She's small. Effectively A4 size… And that smile? She looks to me like she just pulled a bank job and got away with it."
Another incensed customer who visited Florence, complained about queues at the Uffizi Gallery. A travel advisor explained, "They complained that there were queues at the Uffizi and I should have told them… even though I had encouraged the client to pre-book the 'skip the line’ tickets which I could do for him."
Most visitors to London want to tick Buckingham Palace off their bucket list but TripAdvisor reviewer Christopher H was less than impressed, writing: "Didn't excite me at all. What's the point of travelling to England to stand outside of Buckingham Palace. You can't go in. Is the queen [sic] so greedy she needs all 77,000 square metres and can't show off one of the grandest palaces in the world? Wow, a fence, whoop!"
Visitors to a water park were woefully unprepared, complaining: "We booked a day out to a water park but no one told us we had to bring our swimming costumes and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price." Another blamed the travel agent for missing their flights, saying: "We were not reminded to bring our passports and thought that we didn't need them."
Some customers complained after finding out their latest bargain actually was too good to be true: "We bought Ray-Ban sunglasses for €5 from a street trader, only to find out they were fake."
Another traveller was shocked to find fish in the sea, moaning: "No one told us there would be fish in the sea. The children were startled." Another was disappointed with the salty water, complaining: "The water in the Gulf of Mexico was too salty. No one told me that there was going to be salt in the water. It was gross."
One tourist was disappointed after a trip to the zoo, writing: "The animals at the zoo looked very sad and it made our children cry. Can’t they train them to smile?" Another visiting Yellowstone National Park moaned: "We had to cut our trip short to Yellowstone because we were informed that they don’t cage the animals at night for our protection."
A British woman from Blackburn complained to the travel operator Thomas Cook that her Benidorm holiday in Spain was ruined by "too many Spanish people". The 81-year-old traveller suggested the Spanish "go somewhere else for their holidays" and demanded a full refund from Thomas Cook.
One British traveller was annoyed at the disparity between flights to the UK and to the USA, moaning: "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England… it only took the Americans three hours to get home." Another was appalled at a seat mix up on the plane, complaining: "I booked the window seat for myself and the middle seat for my wife but the tickets put us in the opposite ones."
A visitor to Spain was unimpressed with the amount of Spanish people in the country, writing: "The receptionist speaks Spanish. The food is Spanish. Too many foreigners now live abroad." Another complained: "Why doesn’t everyone speak English? We went to Spain and no one understood English. We will never go back there again."
A picky holidaymaker hated the food on his trip to India, moaning: "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don’t like spicy food at all." Another tourist was disappointed by the Greek food on offer, writing: "Food in the Greek hotel was too Greek. We had to eat in the nearby fast food place."